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And our relationship overall feels boring and stuck because of this. What do I do here? You came to me with a genuine question, so let me ask you one in return: if you met your partner now, and there was no chance of a romantic or sexual connection, would you want to be their friend? Would you want to hang out with them and talk to them, are you interested in their thoughts and ideas, are you drawn to their charisma?

If you are thinking about settling down long-term with your girlfriend, the answer needs to be yes. Because yes, physical attraction is important, but in the long-run, appearances and bodies change.

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In the short-term, people get dodgy haircuts and grow unfortunate moustaches. And the inescapable fact facing all of us is that people age, and that changes us, too. Your partner has put on weight, and her appearance has changed — and yours will too, over time. I mean, knowing your partner intimately, knowing their flaws-and-all self — if sex was off the table, would they still be the person you choose to spend most of your time with? We can change them.

These shifts happen through exposure, representation and celebration — and you can shift that yourself. Start looking at and reading about body positivity, and deliberately selecting media that allows you to appreciate other types of beauty — and bring this to your view of your partner.

What makes her sexy now, and how can you appreciate it? Trust me, she knows she has put on weight. But a sudden increase in weight could by a side-effect of a few things, including illness, medication, stress or depression, etc. If this is the case, she could welcome your support in addressing the issue and she may be planning on losing the weight. You could support her by suggesting therapy if necessary, helping her out generally so she has time to go to the gym, or exercising and eating healthily together.

Weight gain can be the of a medication doing its job to fix a hormonal imbalance or thyroid issue, for example — or it could just be self-care. Over-exercising and undereating are not healthy. She will find someone who will love her at this size, and at others. If you have a problem or query you would like her to answer, you can submit it anonymously at irishtimes. When it comes to menopause, there are no awkward or ridiculous questions. Overweight people on fewer carbs and more fat at lower risk of cardiovascular disease. Protection against infection wanes several months after full vaccination, study shows.

Irish study aims to improve diagnosis of developmental language disorder using an app.

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Lindy West: As a fat woman, my body is lampooned and associated with moral failure